So I was in a public restroom at the mall yesterday.

I saw a lady's feet in a stall when I walked in … and there was a very stinky smell so I assume she is taking a major dump. So I get quiet for a little bit and let everything settle down, you could hear a faint grunting sound and the ever so slightly sounding “Kerplunk” of a turd falling out of her ass, other than this womans shit you could hear a pin drop.

Then I let out this war cry as loud as possible and threw myself against her stall door as hard as I could causing a loud bang. I bet that lady hadn’t ever been that scared in her life because she yelled in a very surprised fashion and said “WHAT THE FUCK!” really loud, and started to try to stand up, I could hear her fumbling with her pants up because her belt buckle was making noise.

I was long gone before she made it out of the stall though.